How To Train Your Mind
A few months ago, I called my climbing session short due to an anxiety attack. I was warming up on the wall and everything felt hard. I felt heavy and lethargic, and my mind seemed disconnected from my body. What’s wrong with me? Why do I feel this way? I must be regressing. Those were some of the thoughts whirring through my brain.
Rationally speaking, I know that progression is not linear. That my body will feel different every day. But my anxiety and perfectionism often manage to sweep that knowledge under the rug.
We climb because we find joy in the activity. Climbing is puzzle-solving on the wall, connecting with friends over a shared passion, and feeling a sense of accomplishment (and release of endorphins) after exerting ourselves on a tough climb, even if we do not send.
In the beginning, climbing was a healthy and positive endeavour for me. I still had subpar sessions, as we all do, but it never felt like the be-all and end-all. But a couple of years into my climbing journey, I was improving at a consistent pace, which sparked this “let’s see how far I can take this” mindset. Although it was meant in good faith, this shift in mindset led me down a dark path of disordered eating and overtraining. Yeah… 0/10, do not recommend.
Recovering from an ED and overtraining was a trying time. It took about a year to feel strong again, and another year to stop ruminating on the past. Today, I have no desire to go back to those days when training felt like a full-time job. Back when I was doing random workouts for the sake of burning calories and seeing how long I could go without eating. It’s no wonder I was constantly low in energy, injured, and miserable.
Chasing Your Goals Should Not Feel Like a Rat Race
Despite being one of the worst periods of my life, I did learn some valuable lessons I may not have learned otherwise; The most important one is that chasing your goals should not feel like a rat race. Have you heard the saying “If you want extraordinary results, you must put in extraordinary efforts”? Well… I took that way too far.
I used to tell myself that climbing hard and being an athlete required sacrifice. If I wanted to be exceptional, I needed to be exceptionally disciplined. My life had to revolve around climbing, and everything I did had to be in the name of progression. Embarrassingly, I even read more books to train my brain. At the time, I thought it would make me a more analytical climber… Yeah, that’s not how it works, past Jacquie.
What’s the point of working towards a goal if the process of reaching that goal sucks the life out of you? What’s the point if you feel trapped and wonder when it will all be over? I spent too long trudging through my gruelling training schedule, and constantly questioning if it was at all worth it. The answer is no, it was not.
We cannot depend on one thing to bring us joy or take the pain away. Climbing can be a form of distraction, for the better or the worse. It can also be an emotional outlet. In any case, it cannot be the only thing that fills the void. I’ve seen climbing consume many people I know in the worst ways, myself included. I love climbing and training, and I think about it all the time, but I have found joy in other activities and my body and mind thank me for it.
Trust Yourself
Pushing ourselves and listening to our bodies are not mutually exclusive. It’s okay to be critical of ourselves and experience negative emotions at times because challenging our limits is difficult; It is hard to maintain motivation when we are grinding and barely seeing any progress, which is why we must find joy in the process.
Outcome goals can be motivating and give us direction, but they cannot be the only reason we train. The process must be enjoyable to be sustainable. Some parts of the process may not be fun, because there is some sacrifice to be made in reaching new heights. But if it all sucks, there may be a need for some reevaluation.
I am learning to value effort over results. If I put in 100% effort, then how can I be disappointed in myself (Thank you, Melina Costanza for this shift in perspective)? I can analyze what might be the missing link and strive to do better next time, but what is the purpose of beating myself up when I’ve put in maximum try-hard?
We can’t beat ourselves up into an ideal version of ourselves. Confidence comes when we accept ourselves, our imperfections and all. For most of us, full trust in ourselves and our capabilities will be a lifelong journey. And that’s okay.
The real goal should be to learn about ourselves. Befriend ourselves. To regularly check in and be patient with ourselves as we would with a best friend.
Climb For Yourself
Why do you climb? We all have our reasons. It’s important to figure out your motives and not to get them mixed up with other people’s motives. For example, I got into competing about a year ago because I coach competitive climbers and my partner is a former comp climber. After a few competitions, I realized it wasn’t for me.
I understand why others get fulfillment out of competing and I love watching comps, but to be honest, participating in them is too stressful and I don’t enjoy that kind of pressure. If I’m gonna spend my time and money on climbing, it will be on travelling to climb outside. I love the process of projecting a climb, learning its intricacies and finding beta that works for me. You can’t exactly get that through competitions.
However, comp climbing did allow me to explore a style of climbing that I had been avoiding. Comp-style was a weakness for a long time only because I never touched dynos, coordinations, and volume-centric climbs. I didn’t think they were relevant to my goals as an outdoor climber. But I realize now that I was putting myself in a box and limiting my growth. I was telling myself that I didn’t care about those climbs but in reality, I was scared of them.
I got comfortable with being uncomfortable and learned to embrace failure. I’ve probably made more mental than physical gains since challenging myself in this new way. I’m a lot less intimidated by dynos and have discovered that they are actually quite fun! Also, as a routesetter and coach, I want to be well-rounded and have the best understanding of movement I can so it is important to be open-minded and learn through experience.
Those are my “whys”. What are yours?
Conclusion
Mental training for climbing is all about learning about ourselves, identifying our cognitive distortions, and establishing what we want to get out of the sport. Reminding yourself that although climbing is your passion, it is not everything. We can practice our sport in a way that feels good and still make progress. There isn’t one right way to train.
Working on my mindset has led to numerous breakthroughs in climbing and life in general. I have experienced newfound strength in both my mind and body, and am more attuned to recognizing and avoiding negative thought patterns. There will always be sessions where we feel off or unmotivated, and this is why developing our mental toolkit is so important.
Making progress in climbing is more mental than it is physical. Developing mental resilience and being persistent is the key to conquering obstacles and surpassing self-imposed limitations.
